The Road Less Travelled

In South Africa, colour is often a sensitive matter. I want to start this piece by telling you a story about an unusual friendship from my student days. My grandfather worked on a corn farm in the Free State. From time to time, depending on the season, I would go to work with him. The farmer was unfriendly, lacking interpersonal skills (if you know what I mean). As a little boy, he unconsciously became the typical “Afrikaner” to me. In my mind, this was how all white people were and this is how they would always treat me. It obviously affected my feelings towards them, how I viewed them and how I interacted with them.

When I started studying, I quickly realised that there were many more challenges apart from just my studies. I was so happy to get a place in one of the student residences, but when I reported there the first evening with only bags in my hand, there was obvious discomfort and the HK (residence committee) informed me that there was no room for me in the residence.

After a long time of back and forth, we finally got behind the fact of the matter. There was a bed available, but it was with a white student. This historic “white Afrikaner” residence had never allowed white and black people to share a room. It was hard not to feel humiliated in such a situation. I felt angry and deeply emotional as memories were flashing in my head about what my grandfather and I endured when I was a child on that farm. However, in the middle of this whirlwind of emotions, I heard the silent voice of the Holy Spirit saying, “I am giving you an opportunity to go on a journey of healing and restoration. If you don’t take this opportunity, it will take you a long time to heal.”

Eventually, I decided to move into the room with a student from the Northern Cape and although it was tense and awkward at first, we ended up staying together for three years, serving together on the residence committee and even when we could stay in single rooms, he would sometimes come to crash on my bed saying, “’Rooms’, ek mis jou!” (roommate, I miss you).

The lesson from this story for me is that God has given us a ministry of reconciliation by which we are called to reconcile, not only with Him, but to each other. For years I had been reconciled to God, but God was calling me to a different dimension of reconciliation. This time it was up to me to take a step towards reconciliation and finding healing from what I have experienced in the past.
I want to use the words in the gospel of John to invite us to reflect on what we can learn about the ministry of reconciliation that we are called to:

“So he left Judea and went back once more to Galilee. Now he had to go through Samaria. So he came to a town in Samaria called Sychar, near the plot of ground Jacob had given to his son
Joseph. When a Samaritan woman came to draw water, Jesus said to her, “Will you give me a drink?” (His disciples had gone into the town to buy food.) The Samaritan woman said to him, “You
are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?” (For Jews do not associate with Samaritans.)”
– John 4:3-9 NIV (Please read the full story)

R E A D – Read this scripture slowly several times. If possible, read it out loud.

R E F L E C T – Reflect upon the words being read. Listen carefully. Is there one word or phrase which stands out to you? Focus on the words. Repeat them. Allow God to speak to you.

R E S P O N D – Respond in prayer to God. Tell Him what you think about what you’ve read. Tell Him how it makes you feel. Tell Him what comforts you and what challenges you. Ask for His help to live out the truths you’ve uncovered.

R E S T – Stop. Be still. Stop talking, stop asking and rest. Spend some time in silence sitting with God. Invite the Holy Spirit and allow Him to transform you from within.

This festive season, I urge you to reflect further on these questions:
Have you fallen prey to any narrative that polarises you with others?
Do you perhaps have a modern-day Samaritan? Who?
Is there anyone that you need to reconcile with?
In what way is God inviting you to take the road less travelled?
Our country desperately needs bridge builders. Can you be one of them?

“Now all these things are from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation, namely, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and He has committed to us the word of reconciliation. Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were making an appeal through us; we beg you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God.” – 2 Corinthians 5:18-20 NASB